This Internet Life: Staying on topic is vastly overrated

This Internet Life

While the Internet can be very entertaining with its ability to give you access to millions of other opinions from across the world, there is always flip-side that shows itself more often than not. When it comes to video comments, forum posts, and online conversation in general, the root of all Internet evil comes from those who write off-topic replies. Nothing derails a thread quite like a bad meme, a random nude picture, or one guy calling another out for a duel of words and internet-ego. No matter what the original thread was about, one errant post can send it all crashing to the edge of oblivion (if the mods are doing their job).

Demand Progress activists reach for the lowest common internet denominator: Reddit

Demand Progress is an activist group working for a free Internet and the free exchange of information, and encourages more progressive policy changes overall. It's a noble goal, indeed, given concerns about the government accessing our private data while limiting what we can do online. The organization's most recent rally for comrades in arms was a Reddit IAmA thread, in which David Adam Segal detailed Demand Progress’s current fight against the Computer Fraud and Abuse Act.

On one hand, posting something like that on Reddit makes sense. Many use the site as their main source of internet goodness. Alas, one must always remember that this is one of the most popular sites on the Internet we’re talking about. Many comments on Reddit were about the emails Demand Progress was sending to its subscribers, asking the activism group to stop sending them junk about cases of injustice that have nothing to do with the Internet.

What’s more, a good chunk of the comments were spam and Family Guy references. Some people were legitimately speaking with and asking questions of the Demand Progress team, but as the great Internet gurus say, “the trolling must flow.”

'Said no one ever' takes forced memes to a new level

This is my favorite meme...said no one ever.

Know Your Meme, the one-stop shop for all your internet meme needs, has decided to acknowledge this little catastrophe of an image macro as a thing. Sarcasm aside, Know Your Meme sometimes does a good job cataloging how various memes come about and what sort of popularity they hold at any given time, often including stats and sometimes even a chart or three. This one… well, it’s just bad, and those who use it should feel bad.

Any image macro can be funny if even a minute level of cleverness goes into it. This is not one of those things. “Said no one ever,” originated in 2010 on the Tumblr account  “S**t No One Has Ever Said” (that should be the first hint that this could be either fantastic or utterly abysmal).

The gist of the meme is to have a picture of, say, a tulip. The text will say something along the lines of “Tulips smell like ass/ Said no one ever.” Sometimes they change “no one” to something relevant to the picture, but that hardly saves this meme from being rehashed Internet garbage from a few years ago.* Sigh.

The Chronicles of Comfy Knight and the Battle of the Scrubs

Stay comfy, my friends.

On April 10th, IGN released a 12-minute gameplay video for the upcoming game Dark Souls II. The video features Yui Tanimura, one of the new directors of the series, to answer questions throughout the brief showing of new and old gameplay mechanics.

With the introduction of torch-lighting, dual-wielding weapons, deflecting projectiles with sword swings, and enemies that can burst through walls, fans of the franchise have, for the most part, gotten hyped to hell and back. Within the thousand or so comments on IGN’s video alone, there was much debate about what the finished product will be like. Since no name was given for the character used in the demo, fans have affectionately named this man “Comfy Knight” (presumably because his furry shoulder pads look soft and fluffy).

For the devoted, however, there was another topic up for deep philosophical discussion: Who would win in a fight once the new game comes out? With many raging over the mere thought of the hardcore series featuring an Easy Mode in this installment, tempers flared in the IGN comment box as several commenters began to call each other out on their oh-so clear shortcomings in playing the previous games in the series.

I know gamers these days have the attention span of seven year-olds on Pixie Stix and the egos of football jocks, but holy crap, can’t we just discuss the giant axe that got chucked into Comfy Knight’s skull?

This story, "This Internet Life: Staying on topic is vastly overrated" was originally published by TechHive.

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