Safe Kids

Keep Younger Kids Safe

"Without limiting free speech, be aware of the information presented to your kids," says Cliff Dutton, a technology consultant and father of two from Providence, Rhode Island. With this idea of commonsense supervision, I've compiled ten hands-on, real-world tips for families whose preteens surf the Web. Though this batch of tips is aimed at children ages 7 to 11, some apply to kids of all ages.

Go online together. "The only time my 8-year-old daughter is on the Web is when my wife or I are with her," says Neil Warne, an architect from Eugene, Oregon. This practice makes the online journey a family affair, keeps children away from undesirable sites, and allows you to steer your kids to sites you think match their interests and age groups.

Monitor your child's online activities. "I know of only one thing that works," says Bob Ryan, a desktop computing support specialist from Hadley, Massachusetts, whose daughter has been Web surfing since she was 9. "You make it clear that you have the right to see what sites they visit, what they type, and who they talk to."

Some parents say enforcing a surveillance strategy is more difficult with older, privacy-minded teens. "My 12-year-old daughter is pushing back as she grows," says Dutton. But he's stayed firm and knows "she's safer as a result."

Establish rules. Create and enforce policies that your children must follow when they're online. Remind them to consult you when they see confusing or questionable content. Provide instructions on what kinds of sites they can visit, when they can go online, and how long they can stay there. For examples of such guidelines, visit the Federal Trade Commission and Safekids.com.

Remind your child not to give out personal information. Malicious marketers target kids for private information such as name, address, phone, and shopping preferences. In fact, according to an EPrivacy & Security Report--which surveyed over 1000 parents and kids ages 5 through 13--75 percent of children are willing to share personal information online in exchange for free stuff. Explain to your kids that on the Internet, some people are not who they claim to be.

Know your child's friends. Even if you restrict your children's Web access at home, they can still log on from places where you can't keep tabs on them. Talk to the parents of your kids' friends and gauge their take on safe surfing. Express your concerns about enforcing rules.

Be aware of your legal rights as a parent of a Web-surfing child. "It's important that parents know the legal limits of how personal information from children is handled," says the National Consumer League's Grant.

Under the 1998 Child Online Privacy Protection Act (COPPA), Web sites aimed at children under the age of 13 must include a notice about the types of information the sites collect from kids, how that information is used, and whether it's shared with others.

Parents must be notified by e-mail, regular mail, fax, or phone and must agree with the information collection before the site can capture, use, or share personal data. For more about COPPA, go to the FTC.

Protect passwords and create hard-to-decipher user names. Tell your kids never to give out their passwords, even to someone who claims to work for your ISP. (ISPs already know your password; they'll never call and ask for it.) Whenever you create user names or screen names, don't use aliases that reveal your children's real name, age, or gender. Teach your kids to follow this practice if they ever generate their own online identities.

Be wary about posting family photos in Web sites. Use a photo-sharing site that offers password or other security protection. At Zing.com, for instance, you can create online photo albums that aren't visible to the public, and you can even choose the specific albums that you want to allow your friends and family to view.

Use filtering software. Though this would be my last resort, filtering programs like Cyber Patrol and NetNanny can provide nervous parents with some comfort and assistance. They filter or block specific Web sites or subjects, and they restrict activities such as online chats and file downloads.

Like many parents, I'm not comfortable with such a priori censorship--it's no substitute for an honest discussion with your kids--but you may feel differently.

Another troublesome aspect of filtering programs: None of them are foolproof, and at times they block worthwhile sites, such as those about breast cancer (simply because of the trigger word "breast"). For a list of filtering tools, check out GetNetWise.com.

Consider a prefiltered ISP. If you're thinking about using filtering software, you should also look at ISPs such as Family.net, FamilyConnect, and MayberryUSA. These services block sites at the ISP's end, before they reach your home. They definitely aren't for everyone: They're typically even more restricted than filtering software, and many don't include an override option that gives parents unfiltered access. Still, they may be simpler than software filtering in multimachine households.