Here's a shocking stat: Roughly 90 percent of U.S. Web surfers are still using analog modems. Want another shocker? I'll bet my editor's next cigar that I can squeeze a couple of extra bits of performance out of your old modem. (Of course, winning means having to get it from his clenched jaws, and I'm not gonna help you.)

Okay, sit tight while I show you a few tricks and point you to some of our top-notch modem articles.

First Things First: Hardware

If you're not using at least a 56-kilobits-per-second modem, upgrade. Do a price and product search with our new Product Finder at its modem page.

You already have a 56-kbps modem but want the latest? Think about upgrading to one that has the new V.92 standard. Tom Spring tells you about V.92 and how it'll have nifty features--if Internet service providers cooperate. Tom also explains how at least one modem manufacturer will offer a free software upgrade. Read his " Better Modems for Dial-Up Diehards?" story.

Dig this: If you're using a slow modem, too many Web sites compound your misery with annoying (and needless) opening screens. The good sites offer a way to skip the intro, but don't skip this one.

Here's a cool, free speedup trick that America Online users really need to try. It's a small, free app that patches AOL so it makes better use of its own cache. You see, AOL accesses your hard drive a lot because of a dumb need to perform "disk buffer flushing." And it doesn't matter how fast your PC is, it still will be slowed down. Run the patch, called AOLSpeed, and AOL will perform noticeably faster on most operations and will access the disk less (so it's quieter). After installing AOLSpeed, problems with excessive resource usage should also disappear. It works with the 32-bit version of AOL 4.0, 5.0, or 6.0. And listen, this thing really works. (I tried it on my Mom's machine first, so it's safe.)

Hey, Check Your Settings

If your PC's Registry settings aren't correct, you may be losing out on getting better performance from your modem.

First, make sure the telephone wire (you know, the RJ11) that runs from your modem to the phone jack on the wall is in good shape. Cracks, bends, and tears can hurt the connection. By the way, the shorter the line, the better the connection.

If you need a new telephone cable, Belkin sells one you might consider trying. They claim it's ten times faster than other cables. Nope. In my unscientific testing (at Bass Int'l. Labs Inc.), the cable increased modem performance--but by no more than about 10 percent over a regular cable. I had six friends try the cable, with mixed results: Three saw a slight performance increase, while the others didn't.

One tester theorized that the cable's shielding minimizes electromagnetic interference, something he experiences with cheap network cabling. He also thinks the cable's connectors make better contact than inexpensive RJ11 cables. The cable is 7 feet long and sells for $8 discounted.

The next move is to check that your modem's not bumping into configuration or installation errors. To find out, grab a copy of Modem Doctor from our downloads area.

Quick Tip: Want quicker log-ons? Here's a way to make your modem dial faster and speed up the log-on process.

Now a quiz: Ever hear of the MTU? Nope, it's not the Boston subway or the music video channel. It's an obscure setting in Windows Registry, known mostly to people who use pocket protectors. But don't let that put you off. Tweaking the MTU (Maximum Transmission Unit) can sometimes double the way your modem accesses the Internet. All it takes is five minutes and an unbelievable price: free. Read more about the tweak in " Maximize Your Net Connection."

And for MTU tweaking, the best utility to use is EasyMTU. It's free and easy to use.

Dig this: What happens when you load a car with 800 pounds of concrete and 2000 pounds of lumber? You get your 15 minutes of fame on the Internet.

Are You a Modem Junky? Dig In

I know you're curious about modem tweaking and want to waste another day indoors, so check out these sites:

Al's Winsock Tuning FAQ provides tons of info to help you fine-tune your modem's settings.

The Navas 28800-56K Modem FAQ page is a little more techie. You'll find arcane modem info as well as purchase advice and tweaking recommendations.

Have an older modem? The Ask Mr. Modem page lets you find your modem and play with the settings.

One more thing: If you're a recent reader of my Home Office column or newsletters, you might be wondering where to find the latest batch. Check out the archive.

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