10 Tech Caps for Nerds
Wearing a technology-themed baseball cap is no easy task. It's not the same as choosing, say, a cap based on the sports team of your home town, or on your alma mater. No, a tech hat requires extra attention to your principles and ideals. After all, unlike a tech t-shirt, which is worn one day and then tossed in the dirty laundry pile for weeks, the tech cap is there whenever your head needs covering. Having the right message is of utmost importance.
So we present to you ten of the best ideas we've seen. Some are humorous to the point that they're always good for at least one laugh when worn in public. Others are deliberate in their message, inspiring camaraderie in those who agree, and anger in those who don't. We include some that we wouldn't be caught dead wearing in public, yet we know people who will. And we've even thrown in a couple of caps that actually use the technology that inspires our geekiness to begin with.
If you've already got one of these hats in your repertoire, please don't take offense at our snark. We're having a little fun at the expense of those who actually fit themselves with this haberdashery, but really, you've earned our respect, and -- because we can't resist a pun -- our hat's off to you.
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The Life of Some Parties
Who needs sex, drugs and booze when you've got a router, Ethernet cables, and a gaming rig? Once you stroll into that dormitory basement with your water-cooled, LED-lit tower and Fatal1ty-branded peripherals, everyone will know you're ready to rock and roll all night. By day, this hat will have to suffice.
The Devoted Henchman
So you just landed a job at Google, and received a Noogler ("New Googler") hat to commemorate your status. Even if the propeller top looks a little silly, wear the cap with pride, because you're on the road to world domination and, more importantly, stock options. If anyone asks what you do for the company, just tell them you're the guy that creates the Google Doodles.
The Poor, Poor Neighborhood IT Guy
Like being Spider-Man, being a computer geek is a gift and a curse. And with great power comes great responsibility, unless you're wearing this hat. For once, be the supervillain and don this cap with pride. If you still feel the need to help, just throw on a RTFM T-shirt. That'll teach people to solve their own problems.
The Original Gamester
We've got a soft spot for apparel that makes video games seem cool, and the Pac-Man cap from Lids comes as close as you're going to get. The blue mazes and black backgrounds make for a pleasing juxtaposition against Pac-Man himself, who looms like the logo of a great sports team. At least, that's what we tell ourselves.
The Worst Kind of Music Snob
Not all of us are cut out to be beautiful silhouettes dancing against a hot pink backdrop, and plenty of us struggle to pull off the iPod earbuds as fashion accessory. That's why there's the iCap, an MP3 player that sacrifices any sense of style in favor of pure function. And with built-in speakers instead of headphones, it's "Welcome to the Social" for everyone around you, whether they like it or not.
The Laziest Geek Alive
With the help of dry electrodes, researchers in Taiwan and San Diego created a hat that monitors the electroencephalogram signals from your brain. It can tell if you're getting sleepy while driving, but more importantly, it could be used to control home electronics just by thinking about them. Getting your hands on one of these would be a major hassle, but think of the payoff when you never have to lift the remote again.
The Beater of Dead Horses
As a dial-up Internet service, AOL may be old and tired, but making fun of the once-proud company never goes stale. That's why you can still wear this Agony On Line hat and get a chuckle from those who remember liberation from AOL's cold shackles, breaking free to the Internet at large. Good luck finding this hat for sale, though; they seem as rare as those once-ubiquitous AOL installation discs.
The Nostalgia Junky
The path to any geek's heart is through tech nostalgia, and there's no better symbol of bygone computing eras than the floppy disk. Wear this cap, and everyone will realize that USB, DVD, and MicroSD are just soulless means to fill the unused gigabytes of your life. Sigh.
You know the guy. He camps, he team kills, and he steals your frags. Then, he uses his undeserved loot to buy the cheapest gun in the game, spamming that sniper rifle, exploiting Counter-Strike's most notorious weapons imbalance. And the worst part is, he lives for this behavior. That's why there's a hat just for him, after all. Too bad you can't throw a flashbang at him in real life.
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