Return of the Spam Heckler

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From the Files of Our Grammar Police

Asking for reasonable advise

(from 4947491_1967@gameschwelt.ch)

Would you accept honest council instead?

feeling like a looser in bed? Improve your xxxlife for better

(from yasir@twangarrows.com)

Stop improving it for worse, looser!

Forget expensive doctor's visits

(from incisiveb7@soccerway.com)

The question is, Can we get him to forget them?

New dimensions in ur work

(from sven.yargs@pcworld.com)

It's sad to be defeated by "your" after triumphing over "dimensions."

EFL: English as a Foreign Language

I want sale you rolex.. or other grat watch . do you want?

(from jennykelpfish@geocities.com)

Before you sale me, you'll have to offer some proof of their gratness.

Where can I Canada prescription drugs online?

(from cdmanganize@ketterscorn.com)

For some reason, I thought "England" would become a verb before "Canada" did.

You will like the quality of our soft, but moreover you will like the prices.

(from revisitingbb18@reggaerejkjavik.com)

But meanwhile as to the quality of our hard, it is also of the utmost sell.

Purchase program Microsoft after a half price

(from berneice.basenji@hotmail.com)

And of course, instructions assembly detailed from each with Microsoft.

Intriguing Assertions

Life is full of emotions only when you are healthy.

(from pinheadpromo@royalvultur.com)

Hence the Stoic motto, "Stay sick."

To Men: You can do it

(from xukana5912@tpwigwam.pl)

To Rabbits: So can you.

The most popular bag now

(from garrulousQV@futbalmom.com)

Everyone else bags later.

Age is no longer a barrier for me in bed

(from calamariA@lapdogtimes.com)

Tell it to the judge, Mr. Polanski.

Women don?t care about your money as long as your trunk is long and hard.

(from collectibills64@china-fpmosa.com)

And it's a good thing, because money doesn't grow on trees.

The Imperative Voice

Get your own bot

(from moa@cassowarychaser.com)

Look, I promise I'll give you yours back next week.

Steven Gray, raise a financially saavy teen

(from paypal@info.paypal.com)

Will she be able to spell, too?

Brawl at kiddy league baseball

(from sven.yargs@pcworld.com)

It's a much better way to build self-esteem than picking fights in a biker bar.

Live in harmony with 2 wives

(from icherooster5640@toscatascalli.it)

The key is to keep their husbands out of the loop.

A Little Too Concise

[no subject]

(from [no sender])

You mean it just appeared here spontaneously?

sap

(from RobinseggBlue@newjunkscience.com)

It's either an insult or an untapped market.

Spam

(from reports@mail.irs.gov)

Right.

Also available on PCWorld.com

For other satirical views of tech life from the vaults of PCWorld, check out these stories:

• "The 20 Dumbest Questions on Yahoo Answers"

• "Facebook Pages We'd Like to See"

• "It Takes a Village Idiot: The Jerks of Online Forums"

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