All of the usual Craigslist topics come up in these unbelievable ads: dating, pets, junk sales, free items, missed connections. But instead of being simple and straightforward, these ads are overdone or bent.
Let’s start with pets.
Sea-Monkeys: The Pets That Aren’t Pets
And she has one last request: “Please do no flag and tell me this belongs in Pets. Seriously–they’re Sea Monkeys. Come on.”
Am I the only one who thinks the Sea-Monkeys ended up in the toilet?
Cleaning Up the Neighborhood
There’s really nothing too humorous about it. Until you read the fine print: “Note from the user who submitted this ad: My neighbor continues to illegally dump garbage in her front yard. So I made a craigslist ad for other hoarders to come take the stuff away.” Way to clean up the neighborhood!
Via: FunniestCraigslistAds.com
Best Free Stuff Sign Didn’t Work
Reverse psychology seems to be in play in this freebie ad:
Via: Craigslol.com
A Missed Tip
People often use the missed connections posts on Craigslist to say things they don’t have the nerve to say in person. Like, “hey, I think you’re cute.” Or, “I should have given you my number when I had the chance.” Or even, “You’re rude and arrogant and a bad tipper.”
That about sums up what one pizza delivery guy had to say to one of his customers, the “young lady that lives in a beautiful home on Eagle River Road not far from Wal-Mart.” But he says it with so much elegance (he begins by saying “It was cold, it was dark, the roads were a little icy. I don’t blame you for ordering a pizza for delivery tonight. Nice choice. “) that his 761-word post reads more like a short story
If the woman who stiffed him on his tip ever happened upon his post, she’d likely feel pretty darn foolish. And I dare say she wouldn’t take him up on his offer to return the penny he still owes her.
Here’s a New Twist on Getting the Bills Paid
The catch? You simply have to pay her tuition at the private school she’d like to attend. At $23,500 for the academic year, it’s a veritable bargain. Wouldn’t you agree?
Via: FunniestCraigslistAds.com
In Desperate Need of Motivation
This ad is short and to the point:
“I want to get out of the house and workout everyday. I need help motivating my body to walk out the door. I need someone to come ring the doorbell and tell me to get out of the house to go for a run, hike, kayak or such.
“It should only take a week of this to get me motivated enough to go on my own.”
Let’s be serious, though: if you need this much help getting motivated, do you really think a week is going to be enough?
(By the way, if you’re interested in the job, it pays $8 an hour, one hour per day.)
Or Maybe It’s Just a Piece of Junk?
Somehow, I don’t want any toast now.
Next: Outstanding Room for Rent, That Couch Is Too Darn Big, Hipster Housecleaner, and more.
How to Make Your Ad Stand Out
“Do you want to be homeless? Then you better come check this room for rent out. It has WALLS and a CEILING.” That’s not all: It has carpet, too. As the poster writes, “I don’t want my feet to be cold when I get out of bed at night. Carpet. So soft. Transcends the walking barefoot experience.”
The ad comes complete with a photo of “your bad ass new roommate.” But you might feel like you already know him after reading his ad.
(Via The Consumerist)
Merry Maids, He Ain’t
And should you harbor any doubts about whether a hipster housecleaner will actually clean house, put your mind at ease. His services earned rave reviews.
Now That’s a Headline
A great headline can make or break an article on a site like PCWorld. I’m willing to bet that a great headline can also make or break a sale on Craigslist. Take this ad, for example. His headline–“Either I suck at golf or there is something wrong with these clubs – $75″–just draws you in, doesn’t it? It may even have enticed someone to pay full asking price for an old set of golf clubs and “a bag with some junk in it.”
Funny or Creepy?
Honestly, I don’t want to know how this turned out.
Putting the A– in Class
Well, first, this man is looking to hire a wingwoman–to help him meet other women. Then, he feels it necessary to explain what a wingwoman is. (It’s “a woman who goes into a social situation with the purpose of helping the guy or guys she is with meet women.”)
But what really gets me about this ad is the fact that he describes himself as a “classy professional.” Because nothing says classy like having to hire women to make other women think that women like you. Be still my beating heart!
Who Hasn’t Bought a Couch on Craigslist?
Anyone? Well, if you still need a couch, would you go for this ad, which offers a free sofa “if you can bend time and/or space.”
There’s always a catch, right?
Let’s Hope Her Husband Doesn’t Read Craigslist
Would you really want the kind of person who answers that kind of ad to father your children? Yikes.
[You may also be interested in “10 Craigslist Tips for Power Users.”]
Seen a good Craigslist ad lately? We’d love to read it. Let us know in the Comments below.