For a few weeks now, I’ve been compiling a list of people who are consistently funny on Twitter. I consulted friends and followers, fellow journalists, existing “Funny People on Twitter” lists (there are many), and even a few of my comedian friends. What I found were a lot of “funny” Tweeters who are consistently self-deprecating, angry (sorry @LouisCK), self-promoting (sorry @joelmchale), needy, or rude (sorry @sarahsilverman), but not consistently funny.
I also found some Tweeters who have obviously found their voice in this new medium, and are having a ball writing for it every day.
Fair warning: If you are offended by coarse language please don’t click through to the Twitter feeds I’ve marked R-rated.
Twitter bio: Sometimes I just want to give it all up and become a handsome billionaire. Location: Nebraska, USA
Tim Siedell (aka badbanana) is a regular guy/family man from Nebraska (of all places) who found his funny on Twitter. He tweets a lot, and almost every tweet is funny. Check out his feed. The dude is a one-liner machine.
“One of these days, our kids will realize we’re saddling them with massive debt. So let’s act now and raise the voting age.”
“My wife and daughters are sick. It occurs to me that flu immunity might be tied to sports trivia knowledge.”
“I think @peeweeherman is using a ghostwriter. Read his tweets and you’ll pick up the unmistakable writing style of Chairy.”
Twitter bio: Say or do something stupid in a meeting and I’ll tweet it. Location: across the conference table.
If you liked Mike Judge’s movie Office Space, chances are you’ll get a kick out of Meeting Boy. He simply tweets about meetings and the funny/stupid things people do in them–and in the workplace in general. It’s essentially a funny-cuz-it’s-true chronicle of the everyday bullcrap and doublespeak we have to endure at the great tragic sitcom we star in every day at work.
“Two weeks left on a tight deadline. ‘Starting Monday the team will meet every day for status.’ Problem solved!”
“I hope the unexplained emergency that forced you to be out of the office Thursday through Tuesday went OK. Also, nice tan.”
“Senior management announces that Account Management is now called ‘Idea Management’, but somehow I’m the bad guy for yelling ‘April Fools!'”
Rating: R; scattered foul language, sexual references.
Twitter bio: I’m the patron saint of headbutts. Location: Malibu
Here’s a fake Twitter account set up for Gary Busey. It’s a rapid-fire pun-fest, and not all of the puns are funny. Still, Gary is far funnier on this Twitter feed than he is in real life, and every bit as angry and eccentric, too.
“I’m starting an online community for cats called ‘Tenth Life'”
“I plugged in the Duck Hunt gun and played the Beatles’ Rockband game as Mark David Chapman.”
Twitter bio: Wasssuuuuuuuuuuupppp!!!Location: US – Australia – Other
Barker, perhaps most famous for his appearances in Flight of the Conchords and The Marijuana-Logues, is an always-working, always-traveling comic who likes to tweet his travels and gigs. Sprinkled in are Arj’s unique thoughts on, well, just about everything.
“My email ain’t workin today at all. No email. Anyone else? I hate to think of all the awesome deals on Viagra i’m missing!!! :”0”
“In Amsterdam. Up at 6 am cus the joggers outside woke me up. Bloody wooden running shoes! ;0”
Twitter bio: Better than you. (Not affiliated with the real michael bay) Location: One of My Mansions
I have no idea who dreamed up this account, but its portrayal of a massive ego that loves to tweet never fails to satisfy. The real Michael Bay is the macho Hollywood director/producer who brought us such landmark films as Transformersand Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning. And Fake Michael Bay has no end of fun making light of the many clichés on which (real) Bay’s movie plots–and public persona–rest. (Fake Michael Bay would have ranked much higher on this list, but the most recent tweet in the feed dates back to May!)
“FYI: Bullets cannot hit you if you are either laying down or in a convertible.”
“Some people say that my hyper-masculinity is overcompensation for my betrayed homoerotic leanings fueled by 180mph car crashes. My Answer: ?”
“No homeless guy, I do not have any spare money. Particularly after spending $175 on this Whole Foods Salad.”