We’re probably all guilty of the occasional Web slip-up. Instead of IM-ing your coworker to complain about your wife, you get mixed up and IM your wife herself. Or instead of forwarding that note from the boss–along with a snarky comment–to your friend, you hit reply. Or for a quick hit of mortification, just take a look at your MySpace page.
Hoping not to embarrass ourselves, we devised a few ground rules for our selection process: We excluded faux pas that ultimately made the “victim” millions of dollars (Paris Hilton); nor were we interested in grossly off-putting transgressions (former Congressman Mark Foley).
Still, we’re going to bet that the people and companies we’ve picked would love a “do-over” for their mistakes. Well, maybe not all of them…
13. He’ll Huff and He’ll Huff and…
Whether Tribett intentionally chose gold to match his “Warriors” t-shirt or whether the color just makes for a good high remains a mystery; but his overall look, which recalls a child who has ploughed headlong into a birthday cake, is mortifyingly priceless. The pose even earned Tribett his own YTMND Web page.
12. Putting as Much of America Online as Possible
When AOL posted the search records of 658,000 subscribers (ithe names were redacted and replaced with a unique number), the company couldn’t even fall back on the “It was an accident!” excuse. The release was intentional, part of a horribly misguided research project to give academics a data set to see what people were searching for online. Turns out folks were looking for the usual stuff: American Idol, Britney Spears, cheap plane tickets, and a whole lot of porn. AOL removed the data, but only after it had been well mirrored, searched, and reported on. The company’s apologies fell on deaf ears: AOL is currently being sued over the matter.
11. Meow!
Unfortunately, Schwartz hadn’t accounted for Photoshop’s thumbnailing system, which creates its (quite sizable) thumbnails based on the original shot, not the crop. Turns out Schwartz was topless during the photo shoot, and had actually posted nude photos of herself online by accident. What makes this especially embarrassing is that Schwartz works as a technology reporter and commentator and, one would assume, should have known better. (No, we’re not going to link to it, and yes, you can find it without much trouble…but you wouldn’t do that, would you?)
Most Embarrassing Moments #10 to #8
10. OMG U R SO F1R3D!11!1! TTFN!
Laying off 2500 people means bringing in an army to provide loss counseling, job placement programs, a pile of severance checks, and a truckload of tissues to stem the tears, right? Not! In 2003 British Amulet Group “made redundant” thousands via an SMS text message sent en masse to employees’ cell phones. At least the company had a quasi-excuse: It had just gone bankrupt and was in receivership.
9. Just a ‘Conversation Malfunction’
Women are known to engage in a little private chitchat in the ladies’ room, but how would they feel if the conversation was broadcast on CNN during a presidential speech? When newsreader Kyra Phillips made a pit stop, she unfortunately left her microphone on, broadcasting the news that her sister-in-law was a “control freak,” among numerous other pronouncements. Phillips later laughed it off and even provided a Late Show Top Ten list of excuses for why it happened. Sample: “How was I supposed to know we had a reporter embedded in the bathroom?”
8. I’m Not Dead Yet!
Most Embarrassing Moments #7 to #5
7. Two Words: Ketchup Trousers
Who says the British are eternally polite? After his secretary spilled a little ketchup on his pants, London lawyer Richard Phillips demanded restitution from her–via e-mail–in the amount of a measly £4. The subject line of that e-mail: “Ketchup Trousers.” The secretary failed to pay immediately, owing to her mother’s sudden death, but quickly made the David vs. Goliath matter public, humiliating Phillips. His firm later said that Phillips had resigned, but it was careful to note that the departure had nothing to do with the trousers incident. Which we totally believe.
6. The Case of the Wrong ‘Guy’
5. Well, It’s Not How PR Usually Works
Most Embarrassing Moments #4 to #1
4. The Force Is With Him
Honorable Mentions, Personal Embarrassment Category:
- Mahir “I Kiss You!” Cagri (The “real” Borat?)
- Randy “Peter Pan” Constan
3. I Scream, You Scream, We All Scream for Howard Dean
Dean gave a passionate speech reeling off the states he would soon conquer, and then, overcompensating for crowd noise, punctuated the affair with a yell that was part rodeo call, part slasher movie sound effect, and part yodel. A sheepish Dean dropped out of the race days later after the episode received heavy TV airplay. It’s now a remix staple. (Don’t miss “Deansane in the Brain.”)
2. Guns Don’t Kill People, They Just Blow Off a Toe or Two
Never mind that in 2004 some misguided Florida children’s group invited Lee Paige, a 45-year-old Drug Enforcement Agency officer, into an auditorium with a loaded gun to demonstrate weapons handling. That’s bad enough, but the bigger embarrassment is actually Paige’s, which came just after he told the young kids, “I’m the only one in the room that I know of that’s professional enough to carry a Glock .40.”
Paige promptly shot himself in the foot, and then actually tried to continue his speech, hobbling around and asking for an assault rifle until a terrified room of kids begged him to stop. Caught on film, Paige was (rightly) ridiculed to the point where he has sued the government for “illegally” making the tape in the first place. Good luck with that.
1. That’s One Way to Rally the Troops
It must have been this spirit that prompted Ballmer to take the stage during a 2001 company event to the tune of Gloria Estefan’s “Get on Your Feet,” performing what was quickly dubbed “The Monkey Boy Dance.” Part “Skip to My Lou” and part Nazi goose step, Ballmer “danced” while screaming at his minions: “Wooooo! Get up! Come on! Give it up for me!” A few days later, an unrepentant and sweat-drenched Ballmer would lead a crowd to repeatedly chant “Developers!” Video remixes of both performances abound.